Senin, 02 Maret 2009

English Homework again..

Homework-age back again..
My teacher told me to write a letter to NTU..
This is the letter..

Gading Serpong IA AG9/11
Tanggerang, Banten, 8334749
Indonesia

February 24th, 2009

Admission Office Staff
Nanyang Technological University
Administration Building Level 5
50 Nanyang Avenue
Singapore 639798

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am David Giovanni a student in Brilliant Class, a special class for people who have high Intelligent Quotient (IQ). I am writing this letter because I am interested for applying the scholarship in your chemistry department which your university offers.

I want to get more information about the requirements to successfully be one of the scholars. For your information, I am going to take the A Level Chemistry Cambridge test this June. The question that I want to ask is whether the A level certificate have any influences to the admission and scholarship applying. If it do has any influences, I am sorry for submitting my A level certificate a bit late, but I am going to submit my applications first.

Lastly, I would say a deep thank for your attention and I would be happy to receive your reply in my email.

Faithfully Yours,

David Giovanni


I don't know whether it's right or not :)

1 komentar:

Teguh Santoso mengatakan...

Great, David, for your 1st draft. I believe you have done your 2nd draft after some discussion in our class 2 weeks ago.

Also pay attention to these few errors only:
1. Date (update it, please, before
sending it. C.c. my email).
2. "I am writing this letter because I am interested for applying the scholarship .."

SIR: ... interested IN ..."

3. "I want to get more ..."
4. For your information, I am going to take the A Level Chemistry Cambridge test this June. The question that I want to ask is

SIR: Please replace all "want" with "would like" for being polite in a formal letter.

5. "whether the A level certificate have any influences to the admission and scholarship applying. If it do has any ... "

SIR: " ... certificate HAS any
influence (without "s") ...
scholarship application.
If it DOES have (really have) any ..."

Keep bloggin, David. Great!